you know i am very conscious about the way i present myself.

adjective: thirsty.
ever heard of it?

colloquial term that describes someone who is desperate or, more accurately, desperately seeking a relationship.

maybe it was the way i was raised. i've always been really loving, really trusting, and pretty forgiving. momma always chastised me for showing weakness or dependency on another person. relationships that don't go well should never be pined after or mourned, because if they were, mother would look down at me with critical eyes. and so even when i was a dorky middle school kid with a myspace, i never put out things like "oh i'm single and i like guys who do this or do this." no. never have i ever.

shit, to this fucking day, there isn't a relationship status viewable on my facebook. why? because i'm not thirsty and there's no way in hell that i'm gonna let myself be seen that way. i'm not saying i've never chased a guy--fuck, i might be infamous for chasing after the damaged boys that seem like they need to be saved (this is an issue to discussed at another time), but though i don't think people are wrong for choosing the single choice, it just seems odd to put that out there. it's like getting it tattooed on your e-forehead. no. never. no.

i wonder if that i am saying is making any sense. i just think that even if i'm single, i shouldn't put it out there as if my facebook is an ad in the female-2-male section of the newspaper. no. fuck that. i am not and will never be thirsty!